Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Piece of the pie

I enjoyed reading Vicki Iovine’s, Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy, back when I was pregnant with my first born, years ago.

There are a few things that I remember clearly from that book, one of which is her description of when she approached her husband about wanting a fourth baby. He was not enthusiastic, not at all. He really couldn’t conceive of it, not because he didn’t like babies, or children, or being a father, but because he already didn’t have enough of his wife.

He explained it to her (something) like this, “Imagine that you are a pie -- with each child my piece of the pie, which used to be quite large, gets smaller. Every baby takes a big piece of the pie.”

I mentioned this pie analogy to my husband recently, and his response was, “Honey, I can’t even seem to find the pie tin.”

And it’s true, I really do feel like a ever disappearing pie these days. And I’m not trying to flatter myself here, I’m simply the only mom and wife in the house, there is no other. They all may long for another wife and mother sometimes, but it’s just me. Little ol’ me.

How to make the pie bigger? I guess one way is to stay up later or get up earlier, but in a crazy book I’m reading that Jacquie lent to me, the character who attempts this ends up walking to the wood pile, picking up the ax, and bringing it down on her husband’s skull.

I’m blood averse, so this is not a good plan for me. Plus then I’d be the only one in the house with a license, which would be very inconvenient. (Just kidding, honey.)

So what to do? Stop nursing the baby? Refuse to help with homework? Quit my job?

I like the last option, but unfortunately it’s just not feasible.

Obviously we all just need to suck it up, it’s what all families before us have done and those following us will continue to do. The older girls can start doing more, by themselves, the baby can, um, grow, and my husband can lock himself in his office and pretend that he never got married keep supporting me like he has been. For my part, I will continue to give everybody all I can, and remember that I damn well better enjoy today’s craziness as much as I can because someday they will be grown and gone.

10 comments:

looking forward to some pie in PA said...

oh Beth..
at least the pie analogy makes it seem that you are sweet and desired by all, which should make you feel good.
I have a beautiful apple pie sitting on my counter that I bought at the church "election day" bake sale from the blue ribbon pie baker at our church, and I will think of you and your brood while I eat it :)
My older kids would like a little less of the "pie" otherwise known as me...but that's just adolescence for ya.
Hang in there!

Me, You, or Ellie said...

"Makes it seem..."?? Well, Miss-looking-frward-to-some-pie-in-PA, I'll have you no that I AM sweet and desired by all!

Enjoy your blue ribbon confection :-)

Beth

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Now I've got the Jeffersons theme song in my head. That's a great song! Thanks, Beth!

As you said, these crazy days will be behind you soon enough, hang on and enjoy the ride as best you can!

I think it's time for our baby photo fix, no?

Jacquie

Pickles and Dimes said...

You wouldn't happen to be reading Case Histories by chance, would you? :)

I don't even have kids and I struggle with trying to find that perfect balance to make everyone (family, friends, coworkers, myself) happy.

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Yep. Case Histories, you got it, P&D. I'm really enjoynig the whacky book so far.

I hope you did too.

Beth

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Oh, I read that. (You and Jacquie BOTH need to update your "What Are You Reading" tidbit.) I've read a few of her books. I wish I could remember a single thing about any of them.......

Anyway.

I really, truly don't know how you do it. Job, kids, baby, husband. It's a miracle there's any pie left at all. You sound as if you're keeping your sanity, though, and I'm not sure how you're doing that, either.

Hang in there, buddy. Adolescence can't be far away.....

Ellie

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Ellie, I've been too embarrassed to publicize the smut I was reading, but I just finished so now I can go back to gettin' all literary-like. I picked up one that Mom and Mar recommended (too lazy to get up and look for the title at this moment, will update my status tomorrow), but when I took a glance at it I had to text Mar and demand: "again with the f*cking holocaust?" I had to resort to chick lit first.

Jacquie

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Well, I look ever so forward to seeing what it is. I have 2 at the library for me: "Dragon Tattoo" and "The Weight of Heaven." Still waiting for "The Help".....

Ellie

Johanna said...

I have no idea how you are doing it! Maybe get a babysitter Saturday night for date nights, and take a Friday off every so often to hang with T...you know me, I always like to tinker, tinker, but the little things can make a big difference!

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Thanks, Jo, good advice as always. We do need to get out more, no question.

Gotta get Blanca on the case...

Beth